Battle for the Lemons - CatChan (2024)

Chapter 1: Surprise baby

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The thing was, Inuzuka Miyu was on birth control. The Shinobi kind, that prevented her from even getting periods and smoothed over hormonal swings.

So while she did consider sex great fun and didn't refrain from it, she definitely hadn't expected to become pregnant.

Aomaru was formal, though. She smelled pregnant. She was also feeling a slight tenderness in her breasts, so it tracked. Ninkens tended to detect pregnancies very, very fast. Within a couple of weeks of the true start of the pregnancy (which wasn't exactly the moment the deed was done, but a handful of days afterward). Hormonal fluctuations had a scent. And since her hormonal scent wasn't supposed to be changing at all with her birth control, Miyu's partner was absolutely sure of his conclusion.

So, while she was reeling from the news, she did still book an appointment at the hospital to confirm, and to make what she already knew 'official'.

Though even before heading to the medics, she could already count the days backward. The father would be someone she'd slept between two and three weeks earlier.

...

Ah.

Well, someone definitely stuck out, then.

She almost dismissed her first thought, because honestly... It sounded almost conceited. But also, no, she could count. There was one or two edge cases, but logically, it probably was Hatake Kakashi.

Hatake.

The thought still seemed too surreal. What were the chances that the one time her contraceptive failed it would be for her one-night-stand with Hatake?

Very high, actually, based on the medic's explanation.

Basically, chakra was known to f*ck things up. Especially things that revolved around body functions. Bloodlines were known to make chakra even more screwy. She had chakra, and a bloodline. So did Hatake Kakashi. And she didn't need to tell the medic about her suspicion to know that their two bloodlines had to be compatible.

Dogs or Wolves, both of them.

She instead asked if it meant she had risked pregnancy every single time she slept with one of her Clansmen. She got, pretty much, "heh, not really". Inuzuka was her bloodline. Sure it was compatible, but it was, as far as her chakra was concerned, nothing to write home about.

Besides, while her partner's chakra and possible bloodline would be a big factor to throwing her birth control on the fritz, she was still an important factor. Her own chakra had to involve itself to kick the uterine lining and ovulation back on track. And her chakra was hers it had her Yin chakra in it. It would not go directly against her wishes.

So making her birth control fail had to be a combination of her partner's chakra making her bloodline instincts take notice (possibly by bearing traces of a very compatible but not identical bloodline), and her not being particularly against having a child with said man.

That cinched it.

It definitely was Hatake Kakashi.

The thing was, though... She was nothing to Hatake Kakashi.

They had slept together a grand total of once.

A boring story. Some Noble lost his child and paid Konoha an exorbitant amount to find her. Which was why Hatake led a frankly overkill team of himself, an Aburame chunin, a Hyuuga chunin and an Inuzuka chunin (that's her) to the Client's Estate at full speed to look for the girl. Which was doubly redundant, because no one needed an Inuzuka if Hatake was in the team. But it was good to show the well-paying Noble that they took his plight seriously.

They had found the girl in less than an hour. She had gone exploring in an old annex that predated this Noble family's possession of the Estate, and found an old secret escape passage. The kind that only opened on the 'escape from home' direction easily and had a well-hidden secret mechanism to trigger the other way. A standard precaution so the 'escape passage' didn't turn into an 'invasion passage' too easily.

The passage's exit had been condemned, though, so the child had actually been in some danger. In one or two days. Provided that it didn't rain enough in the meantime for water to seep in so she could drink.

So basically, she was perfectly fine if a bit hungry and a lot frightened.

And they would have only needed one of them to find her. Hatake, Hyuuga, Aburame or her could all have found her alone. Thought it would have taken Aburame a bit more time.

In any case, the Noble was so very grateful, and threw them a party. It was fascinating how many sycophants hung around these types of Nobles. The party wasn't just a luxurious meal. It was a full on ball with a hundred guests.

Now Inuzukas really had no business being in a Noble's ball. It wasn't about self esteem or anything. It was about tolerance for stuffiness and bluntness that made them seem rude.

Miyu would have, by far, preferred a generous tip. And by the look of things, so would have Hatake.

Two hours in, they both found themselves trying their level best to be wallflowers. An endeavor helped along by the fact that both Hyuuga and Aburame were Noble Clans, and so their poor teammates bore the brunt of the guests' attention. She sympathized. But also, their Clan came equipped with temperaments much better suited to handling these situation.

Aomaru, by virtue of being a sizable and slightly intimidating Ninken, both repelled the delicate nobles and attracted Hatake's hands to himself, and so the Jounin had found himself at her side, idly petting her partner's head as Aomaru shamelessly pressed into the pets and leaned against his leg.

Even so, Hatake still radiated tension.

"Can I?" Was how things started off as she lifted a hand and gestured to his back. He shrugged and she slowly reached out to place her thumb between his shoulder-blades, then firmly pressed in and down along his spine.

It definitely was more of a canine-person trick than a true massage, but Hatake did straighten, stretch, then slump in response.

And then he turned his head to her fully. She didn't think the civilians would have seen the calculation in his eyes as he studied her.

Miyu did.

But when he reached for her face and leaned down to her, she played along. It was obvious he was angling for an excuse to retire early without insulting their Noble Client's hospitality. And she was all for it.

They didn't kiss then. Not properly. He had his mask, after all. it was more of a nuzzle involving the entire face. Nothing scandalous, really. But it gave them an excuse to press closer. Gave him an excuse to wrap an arm around her waist and lead her out of the ballroom with a wink (of a blink, who could tell, honestly) at their host and abandon their unfortunate Noble Clan comrades behind to their fates as they headed for one of the rooms their Client had insisted on having them use rather than run back home right-away.

Aomaru faithfully laid himself on the outside of the flimsy door to 'guard their intimacy'.

Miyu decided not to be creepy and flop into the bed un-sexily while removing her breast-binding under the cover of her shirt.

Maybe it was what did it. What got him to suggest making things realistic and start massaging her back.

Then his hands has 'slipped' toward her front, she'd flipped around, and...

She had a very good night.

The next morning, they both sported bite marks (her on the inside of her thighs and on the shoulders, him on the chin) and Aomaru quietly laughed at her.

And then they ran back home, said goodbye, and that was it.

Or so she had thought.

Chapter 2: Dastardly Plotting

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Being Alpha meant that Inuzuka Tsume was, by default, the mother of everyone in the Clan. Secondary mother, for some, but still. They were all hers. To love, protect, train and direct.

That's how the Inuzuka Clan works. The more human Konohans had trouble comprehending that. And to be honest, Tsume doidn't go out of her way to enlighten them. It's none of their business.

But anyway, She is Alpha, as far as animal instincts go, and Mother where human ones are concerned, with the Clan Head title only thrown in to make everyone not Clan who can get human-stupid shut up and respect her authority.

So when Miyu strolled in the sprawling 'Head House' (Clan Den), threw a sheaf of papers on the table and floped into the couch, she just raised an eyebrow and turned to look at her. Aomaru was sticking close, more protective than usual, and Kuromu perked his ears up after an inquisitive sniff, then troted over lean against Miyu's legs.

Tsume knew these signs.

She turned to the Den freezer and took out a raw meet Popsicle, then strode over to hand it over to the expecting mother and sit near. Miyu needed to feel that she and her child to be (hopefully; things could always go wrong, unfortunately) had the Alpha's full approval and protection.

Miyu sighed and grabbed the treat of raw red meat by the bone stick that got folded in before freezing so they could enjoy the treats without getting slowly thawing blood all over their hands in the process. The iced meat went into Miyu's mouth and she suckled and gnawed for a moment. Tsume felt the usual soft warm of providing and having her offering accepted by one of hers.

"I think we have a problem." Miyu sighed after a moment, pulling the popsicle out and wriggling higher on the couch to plop her head on Tsume's lap.

Tsume frowned, settled a hand in the girl's (woman, but that didn't count for Tsume, everyone was girl to her, except some of the elderly) hair. She reigned the protective anger in. Miyu sounded contemplative and sulky, not actually afraid. "What problem?"

Miyu sighed again. "I think Hatake's the father."

Ah.

Well.

On one hand, that was, like, the opposite of a problem. On the other... Damn.

Tsume smirked. "Wow. That's impressive, girl." She teased with an eyebrow waggle.

Miyu giggled. "You have no idea." Then she simmered back down. "I was on permanent contraceptive. From what the medic says, I'm pretty sure it was Hatake who f*cked it up and got me fertile again. It might be someone I slept with after who's the father, though."

Ah. Yeah. Tsume got what Miyu was implying, but on the other hand. "I honestly doubt anyone else could out-compete an Hatake's seed. They are infamous for their virility."

She paused and thought for a moment.

"It probably wouldn't hurt to wait until the little one born to let him know, though, if you're feeling unsure. You don't need stress." Tsume took a deep breath and sighed. "And... If it doesn't... work." She paused, feeling sorrowful at the very concept. But it was always a risk, and being aware of it beforehand helped with coping, should the worst happen. "Then... Hatake doesn't need to lose anyone else precious to him."

Miyu's eyes went sad but she nodded.

It was a bit weird, the way their Clan felt about the lone Hatake.

Hatake weren't theirs. Had never been. And yet, they distinctly felt like they should. Or could.

Before the Hatake Clan deflated to one single member, the Inuzuka Clan had something approaching a celebrity crush on this other Canine Clan. A bit like how silly civilian academy girls get about worshiping popular sempais.

But then the strong, beautiful, charismatic Koshi died. And the Hatake became a Clan without a Matriarch. A Pack without an Alpha. And they felt... Pitiful. But Sakumo was just as strong, beautiful and charismatic, which mitigated the effect.

And then Sakumo died too.

Leaving behind a young, distraught orphan of a son. And the urge to adopt, protect, soothe the lone, pack-less child had hit them hard. Tsume had been young, but already a budding Alpha, and she had wanted nothing more than to snatch the abandoned baby and stuff him into the puppy kennel to snuggle and be dotted on by the ninken moms.

The urge should have died down as he grew.

Except he got more and more miserable and lonely and depressed. Though the pride, strength and 'stay away' vibe that had prevented them from performing an aggressive adoption when he was five stayed. And so did the inconvenient Village and Clan Laws that said Hatake Kakashi was the Head of his own Clan. A Bloodline owning Clan. And that forcefully acquiring him counted as bloodline theft.

By technicality, only. But they had two doujutsu-bearing Clans in the Village, and they were feral about the very idea of bloodline theft.

So the Inuzuka were left gazing longingly at the Pack-member they wanted but couldn't get.

Tsume gazed as Miyu's still flat stomach and smirked.

"Well. But once the pup is born... Only a fool would keep an Hatake from their cub. Such a shame the Inuzuka Clan Laws firmly state that any child had by an Inuzuka woman his hers and the Clan's before anyone else's. And that our Founding Agreements with Konoha are clear that we get to keep our own Laws on that." (There was a reason why neither Uchiha or Hyuuga men ever slept with Inuzuka women unless they were thoroughly sterilized. Inuzuka's custody over the children born to their women was absolute. And trying to wrest it away would be excruciating.)

Miyu tilted her head sideways and backward over Tsume's thigh, looking up at her quizzically.

"Guess Hatake will have to move in if he wants to be with his child." Tsume cackled. "And get adopted into the Clan to get any authority over your child at all."

Miyu froze for a minute, then started cackling. Aomaru and Kuromaru huffed. The ninken were of the opinion that they should have disregarded human rules and made a move on the Hatake ages ago.

"That's for later, though." Tsume rumbled. "For now, take care of yourself and your pup. We can start plotting once it is born."

Chapter 3: Newborn

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Kakashi hadn't expected anything special to happen when he came back home from his latest long mission (an ANBU one). Gai tracking him down for a challenge, maybe. A particularly bratty-feeling colleague trying to prank him. That kind of thing.

When an Inuzuka spotted him, then immediately turned tail and ran, Kakashi got a feeling that 'normal' was about to take a hike. That hadn't happened since he was a very freshly orphaned genin. Or after Minato-sensei died.

He didn't have to wonder what the hell about him was repelling Inuzukas again for very long. That same guy who had fled his presence reappeared with Inuzuka Tsume on his heels.

Ah. So it wasn't about not wanting to be near. It was about telling the boss that he'd found Kakashi, then?

That was better. But it also meant that Tsume had given her Clan orders to let her know as soon as they found Kakashi, which was an oddity of it's own.

Kakashi stood still and watched the Inuzuka's Alpha stride toward him.

"Hatake." Tsume rumbled. "There is something I need you to see."

Kakashi tilted his head, waiting for more. When nothing came, he huffed and nodded. "Alright. Lead the way."

He hoped he didn't need to go far. He was just back from a mission. He was supposed to get to rest.

Tsume led him to the Inuzuka's Compound. Then toward the Head House.

What the h...

The air was smelling vaguely milky.

Kakashi frowned.

What.

Why.

Why the hell would Tsume be leading him straight toward a new mother and her newborn?

He stopped and rooted himself in place.

Tsume turned back toward him with an impatient frown.

"Come on." She growled. "Miyu has been expecting you for a while."

That unstuck Kakashi's tongue. "Miyu... Partner's Aomaru?"

Tsume blinked then smiled. "Oh, how many Inuzuka do you remember only by our Ninken's name?" Kakashi kept his mouth shut. Tsume didn't seem to take the almost admission badly, she grinned and patted her own dog's head. "Well in case you need a refresher, I'm Kuromaru's partner and my name is Tsume."

Kakashi didn't react to the light teasing, because his brain had just caught up to the newborn and milking mother's scent added to 'Miyu expecting you'.

Kakashi could, in fact, count all the way up (and even back!) to nine months. And it wasn't like he 'went around' enough to forget exactly what he'd done with Inuzuka Miyu a little over nine months prior.

Kakashi jolted and ran forth, letting his nose and instincts tell him the way.

Tsume didn't make a single move to prevent him from charging toward her vulnerable Clan members. Something that would have boggled his mind if it was still in working order.

As it was, he was finally close enough to smell cub (his cub, his!) over the stronger scent of their mother. He definitely wasn't up to thinking about anything. At all.

A door disappeared from his path and he barely had the presence of mind not to come across as aggressive in front of the new mother. His eyes caught onto a tuft of silver head resting on the woman's chest. He froze.

Miyu turned her head his way and smiled. (He only saw it in his peripherals. His eyes were glued in the perfect hair and wasn't likely to unstick anytime soon.) She moved her trunk toward him and gently turned the infant so he could better see them. Her.

"I almost waited to confirm with you before naming her, but it was just too obvious." Kakashi blinked dumbly as his legs took him closer without any input from his brain. "This is Raiden."

"Raiden." Kakashi echoed.

He stepped even closer.

Miyu's ninken (Aomaru) stepped aside letting him get close to his human and her child. A proof of trust he would have been floored by in any other situation.

Kakashi folded down on his knees by the bed and leaned into his perfect baby to inhale her perfect scent like a man drowning. She woke up and gave a perfect little giggle, patting at his face with her perfect little hands.

Tsume would need a crowbar to make him move.

Tsume did not, in fact, need a crowbar to make Kakashi move.

All she had to do was bark "Get your sorry ass up into that bed and get some proper snuggles in with the pup."

Miyu laughed and scooted sideways so Kakashi could do just that.

"And summon your partners, already!" Tsume added in a disgruntled growl. "Do I need to tell you everything?"

Kakashi blushed a bit. Right. The pack needed to scent his daughter. That way they could track her if someone stole her.

The thought made an enraged growl bubble up in his throat.

Tsume bopped on the head with a rolled up newspaper.

Where did the newspaper even come from?

Chapter 4: New life

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He hadn't expected to be alive after he died. That was a given, honestly. The logical next step after dying was, well, death.

And his death had been pretty obvious as it happened.

But for some reason, there he was, alive again.

At first. There was only shock. A numb feeling of grief and loss. Considering that he was almost blind, kinda dumb, and perpetually sleeping, the realization of all that he had lost took a while to hit.

When it did, he had a spectacular meltdown that sent his new mom into a panic.

It was his aunt, he thought, who reassured his mom and settled him on the floor with a pair of dogs.

He wouldn't have thought that a valid way to soothe a baby's cries. He would have been dumb about that, though, because it worked like a charm, and within minutes, he was clutching at the dogs' fur and calming down to sobs, then whimpers, before finally falling asleep. Exhausted by his own tantrum.

Meltdown out of the way, he started to grasp what he had gained too. A loving mom, for one.

Raiden. That was his new name.

Or, her new name. As starting to turn her attention outward had informed her of a few salient details about her new body.

She honestly didn't really care about the change one way or another. Just noted that he was now a she, and moved on.

Raiden hadn't thought about her father up until he appeared. There simply hadn't been any men in the picture and she had rolled with it. Until a man barged into mom's room and knelled right by them, staring at her like she was the whole world. He smelled really, really nice. And safe.

Raiden added 'a loving dad' to her list of good things. And she snuggled with him happily.

Getting breastfed was not in the list of good things. But she obviously would have to get used to it, because milk bottles obviously weren't in her future. Mom was obviously one of these people who thought (rightfully) that milk from a baby's actual mother was the very best for their health.

The naked cuddles were something she was on the fence about.

She knew it was good for her. It was just kinda awkward to be laid out on her parents' naked chest in nothing but her diaper. Even more so with mom.

But it was also very soothing and nice.

The dogs were a definite positive.

Mom had a dog. Auntie Tsume had a dog, and dad had several dogs.

And if she thought that was almost paradise, that was before she and mom moved into the common baby room, where there were puppies! Tiny little wiggling puppies with their own diapers.

Raiden even got plopped right into the pile of wriggling puppies without a second thought on anyone's part.

Her new family apparently found it efficient to pool the babies in one place. And Raiden was not complaining about that.

There was another, slightly older baby she had to share her puppies with. But she quickly established dominance, and he never tried to usurp her place at the center of the puppy pile, so it was alright.

One of the puppies was especially attached to Raiden, and seemed to prefer sticking to her unless it needed to eat right this moment. She also had a few really familiar mannerisms.

It was probably why her first word in this new world was "Max". She thought it would be taken for simple baby babble. It wasn't like a newborn puppy would respond to the name of Raiden's beloved dog in her previous life.

Except the puppy yipped happily and wagged her little tail with enthusiasm.

Raiden blinked at the puppy for a few seconds. Then, fearfully, tried something. "Sit." She said. In english, rather than the Japanese offshoot people talked there. The puppy. Her puppy. Her Max. Sat on her bottom with a doggy grin.

"Max." Raiden repeated with tears springing to her eyes. Max jumped on her and licked her face.

The adults in the room cooed and laughed. The puppies' mom came closer to examine Raiden and Max, and then gave Raiden a thorough licking.

Apparently Raiden had been approved of.

From then on, Raiden never got separated from Max.

It definitely went in the good things.

Mom and Dad and everyone else seemed to know that Max was hers, and unless it was for something that really had to have only her (like feeding or changing diapers) then Raiden would be picked up along with Max.

Cuddle time with mom or dad was with Max. Tummy time was with Max. Nap was with Max.

Raiden really loved her new family.

Chapter 5: Creepy interest

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The endless toiling for the good of Konoha could sometimes be tiring, but it was a worthy and necessary labor that Danzo accomplished willingly. And, more to the point, with a lot more skill than anyone else possibly could.

Reading the pile of reports on the whispers running through the village was one of the tedious aspects of Danzo's never-ending quest. But he had found pearls burried in the gossip and rumors often enough to keep forcing himself to read the dry reports his operative wrote for him after eavesdropping.

It was a good thing that his operative were able to sort the useful from the useless by checking who spoke the rumors, to whom and how often. Danzo definitely didn't need to be swamped by an entire village's worth of 'who slept with whom, who cheated on this one and this other one and which kid's father definitely wasn't the one caring for it'. Making it so rumors were only reported to him if heard from at least ten chunins and one jounin didn't cut back on all of the uselessness, but it reduced it greatly.

Hmm. Uchiha not happy. Good. Another of Uchiha grumblings. great. Inuzuka bragging about... Wait?

Genius child?

Danzo stopped on his quick scan of the words and started again from the top, reading properly.

The youngest child to ever bound with their ninken. Only a few months old and already inseparable...

Hmm. That might not prove useful. Inuzuka had proven themselves to be extremely bad recruits for ROOT. They simply didn't bow unless their dog died. And if the dog was gone, they shattered disastrously and died incredibly quickly. Plus, the Clan made a completely disproportional fuss over each missing child. The Inuzuka were simply not worth it. If he could get his hands on a child that hadn't yet gotten it's dog, then maybe, but that obviously wasn't the case of this genius child.

For the moment, the Inuzuka were not a bad thing for Konoha. The Mutts had their uses. They simply weren't fit to be part of the mighty roots that fed Konoha's great tree.

Danzo almost tossed the report aside. But a set of characters caught his eye before he did. Hatake.

"Probably caught the genius from the Hatake father."

Now that was interesting.

An Hatake child?

Kakashi had been so promising. If only Danzo had gotten him just a little earlier, he could have been molded into the perfect ROOT soldier. Obedient and deadly. The perfect tool.

That child was obviously plenty young.

Maybe too young. Not even a year old. Might not even be weaned yet. And the bond with the ninken pointed to it not being the best potential recruit, but still.

It was a matter worth keeping himself appraised over.

Especially considering the chances of the Inuzuka Bloodline reinforcing the formidable Hatake one instead of diluting it...

And if that one child ended up unsuitable... Nothing said Danzo couldn't arrange for more Hatake children to appear.

A satisfied smile crawled upon Danzo's lips as he called in a team to go and survey the Hatake child.

Once the team left, Danzo turned his thoughts back to the upcoming peace talks with Kumo, and how he could turn them to His Konoha's benefit. Not understanding the doom he had just called down on his own head.

Chapter 6: Stirred temper

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The Inuzuka shared nursery was a relatively quiet place.

Well. As quiet as it could be with Inuzuka babies and puppies playing, anyway. Kakashi had found himself made into the designated bed for the little ones whenever he was there (which was as often as he could get away with. He had absolutely no wish to be anywhere but next to his perfect daughter, watching her imperiously hog all the puppies to herself even before she could do more than belly-crawl).

Raiden was laughing, playing, babbling and smiling up a storm. A happy baby. And a joy to behold. Her puppy (who would probably never respond to anything but Max) still lacked coordination, but was all enthusiasm. The Ninken Mom, whose babies were still small enough not to have moved over to the puppy kennel where her babies would have the space and access to the outdoors to start running around, seemed to love Raiden.

Tsume's own children had joined the infant nursery for the day. Two years old Kiba staring at the babies intently. Halfway between fascination and 'how does this thing work'. Hana was eight, and appeared to be trying to seem adult by very seriously assuming the role of a babysitter.

As Kakashi watched, Kiba tried to get in a fight with Raiden over her hogging the puppies. She growled at him, bit him (even though she didn't have teeth yet), and projected the cutest wave of intent. Kiba found himself soundly defeated and retreated to his sister's side in a sulk.

Kakashi snickered and glanced at Miyu and Aomaru, who shared his amusem*nt.

The light atmosphere disappeared in a single moment. With a room that had one or two Kunoichi in it at all times, one to three shinobi and two to five trained ninkens in it, all of them possessing keen animal instincts and very sharp noses, disturbances did not go unnoticed.

Not everyone might know what they were reacting to, but the feeling that a danger was there and vigilance was needed hit everyone at the same time.

Kakashi, for his part, had the skill, experience and knowledge to pinpoint exactly what everyone was reacting to.

Three cloaked presences. Almost perfect scent concealment. ANBU-type camouflage genjutsu.

Except there was no reason for ANBU to be in the Inuzuka nursery. Except maybe if they were fetching Kakashi for a mission. And if that was the case, they dearly should have announced themselves at the door. Or at least came in without a camouflage.

So excluding legitimate ANBU business... But still very ANBU-like...

Kakashi's eye flew to Raiden.

DANZO!

The thought had barely hit that Kakashi's arm was plunging into a chest cavity.

He hadn't even yet processed the reason why it angered him that Danzo sent his drones to spy on him (on Raiden!) that both other blank-masked forms dropped to the ground in a spray of arterial blood.

Electricity ran along the teeth he was baring in a snarl behind his mask.

He surveyed the room.

Contrary to what he was half-expecting, no one in the room was staring at him in horror.

The various persons had pulled the babies and puppies away from the blood, but they looked almost as angry as Kakashi felt. No disgust. No fear.

Miyu met his eye with a deep growl of her own.

The growl found itself echoed in multiple throats.

The other small baby (though bigger than Raiden) hiccupped and started crying in shock. His mother bounced him and shushed softly, but her face stayed hard.

"Hatake." Said Akina, the Ninken Mother. "Swift hunting."

Kakashi trembled in place.

"Aomaru and I will guard Raiden." Miyu assured him steadfastly. "And Max." She added, lifting up the puppy she had scooped up at the same time as their daughter.

"I will call for the clan to assemble and fortify the Den." Tsume growled from the Nursery's door, Kiba already clutching her legs. "Go. Kill whoever is threatening our pup."

Kakashi nodded. He absently checked that he had no blood on his face before giving Raiden a parting nuzzle, then he headed out.

The Inuzuka could take care of the bodies and of the blood.

Kakashi would teach Danzo never to even look at his daughter again.

Chapter 7: Explosion

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Konoha could be forgiven for not knowing the sheer danger of a pissed off Hatake.

Or at least some people in Konoha could.

The very person who provoked Hatake Kakashi's ire was one of the one who should have known better. Shimura Danzo, in his hubris, had decided that since he had been able to make Sakumo die, he was immune to (or stronger than) the legendary might of the Hatake. He was wrong.

The Inuzuka were not among those who ignored how terrifying an angry Hatake parent was. That was why they had allowed (encouraged) Kakashi to go seek vengeance on his own. Sometimes the best help you could be was to stay out of the way. Sometimes backup meant dead weight.

It would take the entire Clan guarding Raiden for Kakashi to deem her safe enough to let her out of his sight long enough to go kill the root of the problem. So the best help Tsume could be was to get her Clan to do just that and wish luck on Hatake.

He probably wouldn't need it.

The other side of helping as best they could was to prepare for the aftermath. These fake ANBU wore some very legitimate gear. It meant whoever sent them had to have clout. Watching Kakashi's back, in this case, meant having proof that his actions were justified. And there were corpses of three fake ANBU in their damn nursery that would stand as pretty solid proof.

Tsume sent some of her youngest Clan members out, who wouldn't be much help in protecting Raiden, to run messages. She may not personally like of the other Clan Heads (especially the Uchiha and Hyuuga ones). But they were pretty unmovable forces, and wouldn't stand for anyone trying to brush off what was pretty obviously a Bloodline Theft attempt (especially the Uchiha and Hyuuga Clan Heads).

While Tsume was ensuring that there were plenty of influential witnesses who could back her up on the fact that a little murder was entirely justified, Hatake Kakashi went forth to prove that the age old fear of his Clan was also perfectly justified.

It was, in the end, a pretty good thing for the Village that Elder Shimura Danzo wasn't at his perfectly legitimate house in Konoha when the urge to violently murder him struck Kakashi.

Kakashi had, after all, been in Root as a teenager, before he escaped with Tenzo in tow.

He knew at least some of the entrances and had a rough idea of the layout.

There definitely was a trail of dead and wounded to show the way he plowed through the underground tunnels on his way for his target.

Danzo, who had, so far, only stolen one pair of Sharingan eyes from his own teammate, and hadn't yet gotten himself an artificial arm, could only use Izanagi once. The result of that mainly being that Kakashi had the satisfaction of bodily ripping his head off his shoulders twice.

Kakashi understandably got the urge to thoroughly incinerate the remains of the old man who had sent spies after his daughter and who he'd seen come back from beheading. Some of the fire Jutsus he had copied were pretty damn hot, and by the time he was done, there weren't even teeth left to identify the smear of ashes. It was only a DNA scan of the blood on his clothes that would confirm Kakashi's account on the identity. That and the fact that ROOT agents would confirm that the place where the ashes were was indeed Danzo's office.

Once the threat to his cub was thoroughly neutralized, brain functions started to come back, and Kakashi realized that Danzo being dead could possibly be a problem. Especially if Sarutobi decided to make it one.

Being a shinobi through and through, and used to sabotage besides, Kakashi's solution was to search for ROOT's archives. Danzo was sure to have documented his misdeeds someway, right? He seemed so certain that he was the Hokage, after all.

There were a few more dead and injured before Kakashi found said archives. A quick snoop confirmed that a good chunk of Danzo's self-recorded actions totally counted as treason, so Kakashi got busy rigging the ceilings with explosive tags all the way up to ground level.

Of course, when a sinkhole violently manifested inside Konoha, various independent parts of the military machine went to investigate. The ROOT archives being right at the bottom of the sinkhole, and Shinobi generally being horrible gossips meant Danzo's various treacherous plots promptly became common knowledge.

Kakashi, for his part, was nowhere near when the Venerable Elder became Most Hated Person. He had already found his way back to the Inuzuka Compound, had taken a shower and grabbed a pair of spare pants and a bandana to replace his mask, and was happily snuggling his cub.